Saturday, May 24, 2008

Memorial Weekend


As you know, my brother passed away in February (Valentine's Day *sigh*) - and my friend Mary Ellen's husband passed away about a couple of weeks later, end of the month. My brother's tombstone arrived in time for Memorial weekend, which makes me glad, simply because it means so much to my parents.







It's raining today - and while others look at these grey, stormy days as depressing, they're oddly refreshing to me, because after the rains...well, you know the rest. ANYWAY...






I received an email from Mary Ellen this morning, and I couldn't help but smile. Today would have been her and Charlie's 56th wedding anniversary, and she shared a story with me that I hadn't heard.



Before you read it (and I don't think she'll mind my sharing it), picture a young bride, about 19 yrs old, who had just married a man 16 years her senior. Her father had taught her how to ride motorcycles, and she met this handsome hell-raiser at a motorcycle rally. Her dad was leery, because Charlie was so much older, not to mention experienced in a lot of ways his daughter wasn't. But the family accepted and loved Charlie - if you'd met him, you'd know why. The man was incorrigible but irresistibly charming.



Mary Ellen and Charlie wound up owning several businesses, which they passed on to their children, helping them establish livelihoods. One of the businesses was a motorcycle shop, and one of their 8 children was Guy Cooper, who was twice named the World Motorcross Champion.


I digress, sorry. Long before the businesses and the children, though, there was the couple. Here's a snippet about their honeymoon.


Hello! 56 years ago May 24 was also on a Sat and it looked like rain that afternoon too. We were married on Sat morning in St. Francis Xavier and the reception was next door in the school basement because at that time the church basement wasn't fixed up with a kitchen. We were supposed to leave immediately after the reception, but Charlie's motorcycle was still being overhauled, so I hung around his sister's and mother's house until about 3 or 4 o'clock when we finally took off on two motorcycles.


We had no reservations anywhere, we just knew we were headed for Arkansas. We would look at the clouds at each highway intersection and he would motion and away we would go.


We stopped in Henrietta, ate supper of a bowl of chili each, which cost 35 cents (and was the cheapest thing on the menu). After church on Sun we continued on south in OK to what is now the Winding Stair Mountain road, a scenic drive, but was then a jeep trail/fire watch road.


There being no restaurants, we took a lunch. Of course, I have a booklet of black and white pics we took on the trip. Most of the photos are of my back when we were riding down highways. Charlie would turn loose of his handlebars and snap my picture from the camera hanging around his neck.


He could ride for miles with no hands, but I always kept one hand on the handlebars. I will never forget, nor did Charlie, how he got tired of me being so slow in riding down hills on the jeep trail, using my brakes and engine to hold me back.


At one point, after several hours of this, he said, "I want you to kick it out of gear and coast down the next hill." So I did. It was the steepest, roughest with big rocks the size of basketballs and deep ruts.


When I finally stopped at the bottom, shaking. He rode up beside me, saying, "I'm so SORRY! I rode as fast as i could and I could not catch you! After this, you just ride as slow as you want to."


My fast ride had really frightened him. We went on to see several places in Arkansas for a week. By the next Sat we were both tired of looking at mountains and trees and were ready to get back home. I'm sure I've told about our honeymoon trip before, but today just reminded me again of it.


Life does indeed go on. Sometimes we're sad when Memorial Day or that weekend comes around, but this cheered me. It reminds me of the joys I've had with those who have passed. It reminds me to be grateful for the soldiers for whom this holiday was established and for everyone whose life I celebrate when I think of this day.


Here’s an article about Guy, in case you’re interested.


And here are some links about Mary Ellen’s grandson, Kenny Bartram, who carries on his Uncle Guy’s motorcycle marvels.

AST.com (good looking fellow, isn’t he? *g*)
Kenny & Baja 1000
Cowboy Kenny in Caineville



Have a good weekend, everybody.


~ Sunny Lyn

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6 Comments:

At 1:18 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

...and for those who are reading, I did get Mary Ellen's blessing to post this. :)

 
At 3:25 PM, Blogger Beth said...

I love your positive outlook.
And it's true - somehow, some way, those rainbows do appear.

 
At 3:42 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

Thanks, Beth. 2008 started off kinda rough, and it may get rougher, but...gotta hang onto the good that we can grasp.

hugs, woman...have a good weekend...

 
At 9:33 AM, Blogger Merry said...

Winding Stair is stunning, but I cannot imagine doing it as a jeep trail! Wow.

Good memories. Makes you really appreciate the small things in life.

Hope you have rainbows the rest of 2008.

Love ya!

 
At 2:10 PM, Blogger Sam said...

Lovely post and wonderful memories.
The ride down the hill made me smile, as did the 35 cent bowl of chili (Well, I remember when gas was 25 cents a gallon!)

 
At 1:52 AM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

Thanks, Sam. Laughing here - I remember filling up my little car for 25 cents when it was about half full - lol.

 

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Next Up on the Passionate Ink Cyber Tour - SHARONA NELSON!!!!!


COVER ME by Sharona Nelson


Amber Quill Press

ISBN: 978-1-59279-664-9 (Electronic)

ISBN: 978-1-59279-691-5 (Paperback)

Buy link: http://www.amberquill.com/CoverMe.html

Excerpt link: http://www.sharonanelson.com/Books.html#excerpt


COVER ME—the story of a single mom, a single man, and a health insurance plan…

Single mom Sunny Montgomery survived a lousy childhood with hippie parents as well as a terrible marriage with the cheating Kirk Stanley (AKA Kirk the Jerk), so she figured she could deal with whatever life threw at her. In short order, however, Sunny loses her job, car, health insurance, and life’s savings.


What’s a single mother to do? Get married, of course—though not for love.


Sunny accepts a marriage-of-convenience offer from her landlord, Ben Hart, so that she and Libbie, her asthmatic daughter, will have health insurance. The only problem is, she’s falling in love with him—despite the fact she thinks he’s gay. And, while she sometimes craves more distance from the temptation known as Ben, heaven knows that good, affordable apartments in Boston are as rare as winters without snow.


Through it all, Sunny perseveres. Whether beset by estranged hippie parents, money troubles, a creepy new boss, an is-he-or-isn’t-he faux husband, or the Boston mob, Sunny sustains herself with her inner strength, her best friend Dulcie, odd-duck neighbor Ray, and lots of mac-and-cheese, hot dogs, and ice cream. Oddly enough, what Sunny’s daughter, Libbie, wants—comfort food and plenty of SpongeBob SquarePants on the tube—aren’t fundamentally different from what Sunny wants—happiness and love.


Sunny’s struggles teach us that making lemonade from life’s abundant supply of lemons isn’t too difficult, as long as we follow our hearts…


About Sharona


I spent most of my adult life in the Boston area. (I miss the city, but not the winters. Heaven is eighty degrees and blue skies.) While in Boston, I was a jack-of-all-trades, mastering two: radio personality and technical writer/online help designer. I also worked as a taxi driver, clerical chartist for the Federal Reserve Bank, and temporary office worker for half a dozen companies. However, fiction writing is my first and longest-lived love.


The inspiration for COVER ME was my own life, though the book was heavily fictionalized, of course. I did not marry my husband for health insurance, nor is my ex a rat like Kirk the Jerk—far from it. I will admit to being a single mom for a while, and I do have a daughter, now grown, who could show a bit of Libbie’s attitude when young—and still does, on occasion…


I read widely, adoring a good story with quirky characters. Besides reading, I enjoy being around horses and cats, singing, creating new recipes, taking solitary road trips, and hanging with friends. I confess to being hopelessly addicted to the wonderfully-over-the-top television shows Boston Legal, House, Men in Trees, Ugly Betty, Desperate Housewives, and 24. I write erotic romance under the name Barrie Abalard.


My family and I currently live in one of the Middle Atlantic states, but are considering relocating someplace it’s warmer in the winter.



QUESTIONS:


1. With which character do you identify most closely?


I partially identify with the heroine, Sunny, but also equally identify with her nutty hippie mother, Daphne (“Daffy”). Because both characters have elements of me in them, COVER ME was a pure hoot to write. I was very much a hippie chick for many, many years, and still hold a lot of the same political values. I also have a grown daughter, so I know how the mother would feel about the estrangement with her daughter. But, because I’ve also dealt with difficult parental relationships in my own life, I perfectly understand why Sunny might want to keep her mother and father at arms’ length, and why she might feel pissed off at them.


2. Where did you get the idea for your latest book?


A long time ago, I was living with the man who’s now my husband. We’d never felt any special impulse to tie the knot, but when my ex said he planned to remarry, that meant I’d lose my health insurance. So, my live-in of nearly ten years and I got married. Though we do love each other, we had some fun with the wedding, including putting the initials of the health plan on the arch over the bride and groom atop the ice cream cake (ice cream cake because my daughter doesn’t like regular cake.)


I told the complete story of my wedding to someone once, and they said, “You should write a story about someone who gets married for health insurance.” The idea appealed to me, and the inspiration for COVER ME was born.


I spent most of my adult life in the Boston area, so setting the story there was a no-brainer. By the way, the information about health insurance options for the unemployed was accurate when the book went to press. But now Massachusetts has a completely different system. (Just wanted Massachusetts readers to know that yes, I do the research, but the Commonwealth changed the game on me when it was too late to revise the manuscript!)


3. Do you have a favorite comfort food?


Like my heroine, Sunny, and her daughter, Libbie, I love most all comfort food: old-fashioned macaroni and cheese (not some low-fat imitation), ice cream, homemade soups, rice pudding with lots of cinnamon and raisins. I love pretty much anything chocolate, though peanut butter’s a close second, and I’ve been known to go ga-ga over a rich, cinnamon-y coffee cake, too.
And coffee—I love coffee (any anything mocha). I would drink it 24 hours a day if it didn’t destroy my sleep. Starbucks is on my speed dial. (my kinda friend, Sharona - lol - Sunny Lyn here checks herself in mirror to make sure we're not the same person)


4. What is your idea of a perfect romantic evening?


Champagne, a satisfying meal, chocolate, flowers, lingerie that makes my middle-aged body look good, and a nice, hot bath for two. Or a hot tub. Use your imagination for what happens after the hot tub.


5. What makes a hero for you? Do you see them on the street, or are they simply in your head?


Ah, heroes. They’re almost always completely in my head, though occasionally inspired by men I’ve known.


While I sometimes write those alpha he-men guys, I tend to prefer someone a bit less, um, alpha in my real life. Ben’s sort of an amalgam, a bit more beta than I normally care for. However, he reminds me of some hard-science academics I’ve known and loved.


For me, a real hero is a man who’s not afraid to take a chance and reveal his heart when it’s clear he’s fallen for the heroine. Ben was a little slow to risk it all, but in the end, he jumps off the cliff of love. He may not be Rambo, but he wants to help and protect Sunny and her child. He’s a genuine, 100% good guy. In a movie or TV show, Ben might be best played by the actor who plays Henry on “Ugly Betty” (Christopher Gorham). Gorham’s character looks very much as I imagined Ben would, and he’s got the perfect combination of awkwardness, nervousness, inexperience, and willingness to pursue the woman he loves.


6. What advice would you give to aspiring romance writers?


Write what you love, because if you become a hit, readers are going to want more books in the same subgenre. That’s one of the best reasons not to write to market in some genre you don’t enjoy—you might end up with a career in it.


I also suggest you take the time to school yourself on the basics of grammar and story construction. It’s rare for an editor to buy a story whose mechanics aren’t the best.


Also—as they say in “Galaxy Quest” (and what a wonderful, silly movie that is)—Never give up! Never surrender!


Don’t quit trying, no matter what.


7. What does your writing space look like?


It looks as if a paper bomb has gone off, and I’m sitting at ground zero. I am a very messy person when I’m creating. When I have some time after finishing a project, that’s when I clean up (if then).


More concretely, I have a nice, big desk with a computer and several small items that have personal significance, along with all the paper. I spent some money on ergonomics because I have fibromyalgia, and I need my work space not to cause me any additional pain.


I have a wall lamp I rarely turn on, so I’ve draped a very colorful net-and-sequins shawl over the lampshade. It brightens up my little corner nicely. I also have a floor-to-ceiling bookshelf that holds my research books and my promotional materials, among other things. My calendars (I have two) are within eyeball distance and/or reach. I live or die by my calendars. If I don’t write something down, I’ll never, ever remember the deadline.


8. What do you have planned for your next book?


I’m working on two stories. One is a novel set in Seventies Boston that, again, is inspired by parts of my own life. The book is written, but needs revisions—a lot of revisions. The working title is “Alice in Boogieland”, but I’m not wild about the title. So far, I haven’t come up with anything that’s much better. (Unless a title comes to be at the beginning of a story, my titles usually stink.)


The other novel is a contemporary story of two sisters who are like day and night, and who can’t really stand each other, but who come together to search for their third sister. But is she really their sister? The working title is “Shirley Goodness and Mercy,” and I’m told the first chapter—a funeral—is reasonably funny. The book’s not finished. It’s set partially in southern NJ, southern Delaware (where I’m from), and in the deep south—the sisters, Shirley and Mercy, were born and raised in Louisiana.


9. Of all the stories you’ve written, which book is the closest to your heart? Why?


I think that would be “Alice,” mentioned above. The storyline is intensely personal, as are a number of the characters in it—that’s one of the reasons it needs a heavy rewrite. I think writing that book was more like therapy than novel-creating, and it needs to be a novel, a good one.
My life in the Seventies was darned crazy and quite unorthodox. That’s all I’m going to admit to here. But having a juicy past does make for great story ideas.


10. What is your stress buster?


I love to go on solitary road trips. Being alone is the best tonic for me, and traveling alone combines two situations I enjoy. As I can’t take road trips every time I’m stressed out, I substitute a long walk, all by myself.


Reading a gripping novel also relaxes me. I’d rather read than watch television or go to a movie. This must be the reason I have several enormous bookshelves crammed full of interesting tales.


11. What is the last time you did something for the first time? What did you do? Any feelings from the experience?


I recently returned from a trip to Cairo (yes, the Cairo in Egypt) to visit my daughter, who is researching her doctorate. I knew not one word of Arabic, nor did I have any idea what I was in for. Now I know about five words in Arabic and can tell you I loved, loved, loved being there. My daughter acted as my own personal guide to the ruins in Luxor, and spoke for me every time Arabic was needed. (It’s wonderful when you realize the kid you raised has turned into an absolutely sterling adult.)


The Egyptian people are warm, friendly, and generous. I truly enjoyed the many folks we met, from the guy who made my morning coffee, to the woman my daughter has been working with. I would love to go back and spend about a month in Cairo, sharing my daughter’s apartment, both of us writing.


I believe in challenging myself with new activities on a regular basis. It keeps me from growing old on the inside. The outside, I can’t do much about.


12. Describe yourself in one word.


Independent as the day is long!
Thanks, Sharona!


Sharona Nelson


Modern romantic comedy with attitude—because you don’t want to read your mother’s romances


http://www.sharonanelson.com/

http://www.sharonanelson.blogspot.com/

http://www.myspace.com/authorsharona

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3 Comments:

At 10:52 AM, Blogger Nina Pierce said...

I love Sharona's cover. Great interview! Wishing you many happy sales!

 
At 11:04 AM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

I love that cover, too - and her interview questions make me want to know more about her writing (as does the blurb - lol).

 
At 4:20 PM, Blogger Alexis Fleming said...

Fantastic interview. Congrats on the new release, Sharona.

 

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Saturday, May 17, 2008

Whazzup Here

Okay, so my litttle camera phone doesn't capture the close up crap I want at times, but these two photos bring back such a good day memory that I had to post 'em. Ann Wesley Hardin flew down (on her broom) from East Coast to be with her sister, the fabulous Jane. The 3 of us went to lunch - with Ann driving Jane's big ole van. We stop at a Mexican restaurant next to a shop called called Beer Cave Wine & Spirits, and...

* * *

Ann being the Bat Dame, naturally we had to take a photo of Ann and Jane beneath the sign.

* * *


One thing...Jane has a funky alarm or something on the key fob, and Ann kept triggering it every time we'd enter or exit the damned van, and I caught a shot of Ann trying desperately to shut off the alarm before somebody called the cops, thinking we were robbing the liquor store.

* * *


Ya just had to be there. Jane bought my lunch - Ann provided entertainment - I provided the feed-me-fix-me project for the day.

* * *


Why neediness? OMG - we have a WEDDING coming up in this family, and do you have any idea how long it's been since I've been around GIRLS, much less BRIDES? Lots to do. The Girl and I spent morning at tailor's getting gown altered and a bustle working. She and The Boy are tasting wedding cakes and shopping for flowers this afternoon while I prepare a nice big salad or two. (Couldn't make up my mind - garden salad or potato salad, latter of which nobody but me likes - couldn't decide, so I'm making both.)

* * *


I'm in love with my community. I'd like to have spent the entire afternoon wandering downtown. We have a large clock tower and Farmers' Market with fresh fruits & veggies. We have sidewalk cafes where folks were outside listening to live bands at the Market. There are shops galore, craft stores, furniture stores, everything from a Russian luncheon type bistro to a Harley bar & grill, where bikers from umpteen states were outside having a grand ole time.

* * *


Ann's only been gone a week, but I miss her already. Thanks for the lunch, Jane - thanks for the fun, both of you.

* * *


I'm off to pamper myself - a shower, bit of reflexology, manicure, pedicure, maybe a facial and an herbal wrap. Grilled steaks and potatoes for supper to go along with my 2 salads - lol. Maybe some carrots and homemade sweet bread. I make killer bread, if I do say so.

* * *


I've spoken with Cosmo about the article - still no word for certain. Did a set of edits last week and have TWO more staring at me for this week. Which is good - it means books coming out soon. Submitted 2 manuscripts to TPTB who may or may not shoot me down, but I gotta try.

* * *

Yep. Today is pampering day. I may even bake doggie treats for my pooches so they can feel pampered, too. They like my Peanut Butter Paws.

* * *


Have a great weekend, folks.
~ Sunny Lyn

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5 Comments:

At 1:13 PM, Blogger Merry said...

I need the recipe for Peanut Butter Paws - Echo and Flint love PB.

GIRLS - yeah, they're different. But we love 'em and wouldn't ahve them any other way!

Love ya!

 
At 4:59 AM, Blogger Sam said...

Ann flew in on her broom! LOL - Has she seen that yet?

:-D

Sounds like you've been busy. I Love potato salad. Can never have too many hard boiled eggs in it, n'est pas?

And a wedding. How fun!!!!

 
At 6:47 AM, Blogger Beth said...

A day of pampering sounds good. I've always wondered about the benefits of reflexology - just might try it.

Best of luck with Cosmo.

 
At 5:02 PM, Blogger Denise Patrick said...

Sounds like a good time was had by all. Too funny about the alarm.

I need a day to relax and pamper myself. Maybe next week - you'll have to go read my blog to understand, but this weekend will be a LONG one (and not just because it's Memorial Day)!

Have fun with the wedding. It sounds exciting. Are the kids excited? When is it?

 
At 7:55 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

Will post recipe SOON, Mer. No, Ann hasn't seen post, Sam - that's what she gets for having a life and not reading others' blogs. *smirk* And OUI on the boiled eggs in potato salad - lol.

*waves to Beth and Denise* I highly recommend the pampering if you can get a good reflexologist.

 

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Wednesday, May 14, 2008

oh good grief

Is it just me, or is everyone attending the upcoming writers' conferences a bit baffled by the money aspects? Used to be, you could send in your reservation for RT, for instance, in January or February and be assured of getting a conference registration without hassle...and a ROOM soon afterward.

NOW...they're taking advance payments IN SEPTEMBER for an APRIL conference, and you STILL might wind up in a motel 1/2 mile down the street from the convention. The next RT convention will be held at the Wyndham Orlando Resort April 22-26, 2009.

RWA - same thing - earlier and earlier, the fees are mounting - more every year, it seems, and just because you secure your reservation does NOT mean that the hotel will have you listed, even if you've checked via telephone or internet within days of arriving, just to make certain you're booked!

I love my writers' conferences. Just seems that the red tape lasts longer than the coffee breaks any more. *wry smile*

So...anyone else going next year? I have San Francisco under my belt for this year but am working on attending both conferences next year, RT in Orlando and RWA in DC. We...shall...see.


* joke from Janet* Underwear Dust

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife 'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!'

His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded. The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer. '

What the Hell is this??' he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out.'

April,' he hollered into the bathroom, 'why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?'

She replied ...'It's not talcum powder......It's 'Miracle Grow'

Photo of the Day - Flood Survival Kit

(you've gotta be kidding...)

Toilet Paper......................................check

Bud Light.........................................check

Keystone Ice Beer.............................check

Budweiser........................................check

Red Dog...........................................check

Misc. other bottles of alcohol...........check

Piece of plywood to float your old lady and booze on .................check


And I repeat...

Good

Friggin'

GRIEF!

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6 Comments:

At 6:38 PM, Blogger Beth said...

Your blog is well-named.
Thanks for the laughs!

 
At 6:56 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

aww - glad I could give you a chuckle or two. :)

 
At 2:28 AM, Blogger raine said...

Does that guy have his priorities straight, or what?
Lol!

 
At 3:44 AM, Blogger Sam said...

Conferences are Way too expensive for me. And it's strange how expensive they are. I work for a scientist, and his conferences are free. In fact, he gets invited to talk and they put him up in a hotel and feed him dinner.
I think I'll be a scientist in my next life. Being a writer can really suck.

 
At 10:25 AM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

agree, Raine - LOL

Sam, agree with you, too. Trouble is, I'm not a good scientist. Not THAT great of a writer either - lol. I would sooo love to meet you at one of these conferences, though.

How's the hubby? How's your writing going?

 
At 2:10 PM, Blogger Jennifer said...

Hi Lyn,
Oh, hubby is doing much better, thank you. He will be getting a pacemaker on Monday, so that means he'll be home soon. I can't wait.
As for writing, I'm sort of in hiatus. I'm waiting to hear back from Theresa about a submission I sent in about 3 mos ago. That about sums up the writing life: Griping about expensive conferences and waiting, waiting, waiting!
:-D

 

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Saturday, May 10, 2008

Nasty

About those nasty EC Cavemen…

I’m sure by now that many of you reading my blog will have read others’ comments about how raunchy the Ellora’s Cave Cavemen were at the recent Romantic Times convention. Well, re: their dancing, depending upon how prudish you are or how open-minded, you can judge for yourself here. Does this seem inappropriate for a romance writers’ convention to you?

About those nasty rumors regarding the fight between Samhain and Ellora’s Cave…

HELL NO, I’m not gonna comment. I WILL say this: I have never ever received a late payment from EC (in fact, my sales there are better than ever), I have never had reason to question their ethics, motives, or handling of my books, and saying something nice about one of them is no crappy reflection on the other one, so get over yourself if you think it is.

About whether or not RT should have a separate “goody room” for their attendees next year…

Unequivocally YES. Say what you will about RWA, but there would never be the same problem at one of their conferences, so I don’t see the big deal in securing one freakin’ room for authors’ promo materials during the RT conference. Sure, RT would have to pay for it, but c’mon. Our conference fees are steep enough to cover the cost.

#1, it would keep those who haven’t paid for the conference from snagging materials that are there for the readers, booksellers, authors, and editors who DID pay for the conference. #2, it would keep some unsuspecting hotel guest from bitching about promo materials that they shouldn’t have access to in the first place. #3, it’s unfair to the authors who pay for those promo materials to have them removed simply because someone outside the conference objects to the content.

Do I think that people who paid to stay in that hotel should be subjected to material that offends them? NO. I also don’t think that authors paying for a writers’ conference should be forced to cater to the needs of anyone outside the confines of that same conference. Therefore – secure us a room for our promo materials and be done with the issue.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
avoid the (nasty) funny tale if you are offended by fart jokes...

Subject: Home Made Chili (story about a man, not me, FYI – lol…BUT…there by the grace of God go I type stuff…) – He says…

I went grocery shopping recently while not being altogether sure that said course of action was a wise one. You see, the previous evening I had prepared and consumed a massive quantity of my patented "You're definitely going to mess yourself" chili.

Tasty stuff, albeit hot to the point of being painful, which comes with a written guarantee from me that if you eat the next day both of your butt cheeks WILL fall off.

Here's the thing. I had awakened that morning, and even after two cups of coffee (and all of you know what I mean) nothing happened. No "Watson's Movement 2". Despite habanera peppers swimming their way through my intestinal tract, I appeared to be unable to create the usual morning symphony referred to by my next door neighbors as thunder and lightning.

Knowing that a time of reckoning had to come, yet not sure of when, I bravely set off for the market; a local Wal-Mart grocery store that I often haunt in search of tasty tidbits.

Upon entering the store at first all seemed normal. I selected a cart and began pushing it about dropping items in for purchase. It wasn't until I was at the opposite end of the store from the restrooms that the pain hit me. Oh, don't look at me like you don't know what I'm talking about. I'm referring to that "Uh oh, gotta go" pain that always seems to hit us at the wrong time. The thing is, this pain was different. The habaneras in the chili from the night before were staging a revolt. In a mad rush for freedom they bullied their way through the small intestines, forcing their way into the large intestines, and before I could take one step in the direction of the restrooms which would bring sweet relief, it happened. The peppers fired a warning shot.

There I stood, alone in the spice and baking aisle, suddenly enveloped in a noxious cloud the likes of which has never before been recorded. I was afraid to move for fear that more of this vile odor might escape me. Slowly, oh so slowly, the pressure seemed to leave the lower part of my body, and I began to move up the aisle and out of it, just as an elderly woman turned into it.

I don't know what made me do it, but I stopped to see what her reaction would be to the malodorous effluvium that refused to dissipate, as she walked into it unsuspecting. Have you ever been torn in two different directions emotionally? Here's what I mean, and I'm sure some of you at least will be able to relate. I could've warned that that poor woman but didn't. I simply watched as she walked into an invisible, and apparently indestructible, wall of odor so terrible that all she could do before gathering her senses and running, was to stand there blinking and waving her arms about her head as though trying to ward off angry bees.

This, of course , made me feel terrible, but then made me laugh.

Mistake.

Here's the thing. When you laugh, it's hard to keep things "clamped down", if you know what I mean. With each new guffaw an explosive issue burst forth from my nether region. Some were so loud and echoing that I was later told a few folks in other aisles had ducked, fearing that someone was robbing the store and firing off a shotgun.

Suddenly things were no longer funny. IT was coming, and I raced off through the store towards the restrooms, laying down a cloud the whole way, praying that I'd make it before the grand mal assplosion took place.

Luck was on my side. Just in the nick of time I got to the john, began the inevitable "Oh my, Oh my", floating above the toilet seat because my butt is burning SO BAD, purging.

One poor fellow walked in while I was in the middle of what is the true meaning of "Shock and Awe". He made a gagging sound, and disgustedly said, " Oh h h h!", then quickly left.

Once finished I left the restroom, reacquired my partially filled cart intending to carry on with my shopping when a store employee approached me and said, "Sir, you might want to step outside for a few minutes. It appears some prankster set off a stink bomb in the store. The manager is going to run the vent fans on high for a minute or two which ought to take care of the problem."

That of course set me off again, causing residual gases to escape me.

The employee took one sniff, jumped back pulling his shirt up to cover his nose and, pointing at me in an accusing manner shouted, "IT'S YOU!", then ran off returning moments later with the manager. I was unceremoniously escorted from the premises and asked none too kindly not to return.

Home again without having shopped, I realized that there was nothing to eat but leftover chili, so I consumed two more bowls. The next day I went to shop at Albertson's. I can't say anymore about that because we are in court over the whole matter. They claim they're going to have to repaint the store.

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4 Comments:

At 10:03 AM, Blogger Amie Stuart said...

I envy your tv-phobia! *sigh*

 
At 10:55 AM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

actually, I think it's called having a life...sort of - lol

 
At 7:09 PM, Blogger Beth said...

If I was "offended by fart jokes" I would have left home years ago. With three boys, the topic (and the actual emitting of) gas comes up (and out) frequently.
Good and funny tale! Poor guy.

 
At 11:04 PM, Blogger Denise Patrick said...

Very funny! And, I didn't think the dancing guys were bad at all.

Thanks for dropping by my website.

 

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Tuesday, May 06, 2008

My Cyber Tour














Mistress Mine is on tour this week with the Passionate Ink Cyber Tour ladies, and in case any of you have read Nina's blog (link to the right in the PI Cyber Tour "box") and think I'm full of it, my MEN in DC are truly fabulous.











The wine, cheese, fruits, crackers - the mojitos, the city itself, a Starbucks on every block - lol, the museums and restuarants, the drag queen shows, the monuments, the bed & breakfast type treatment I get every time I visit them - I cannot say enough.



















Their yard and house are filled with gorgeous flowers that the guys plant and tend.



I awaken every morning to gourmet coffee - and that's before heading out for the city and the various stops at Starbucks - lol.







There's a monster hot tub. Need I say more?




Oh. About that book, or books that are out now...









This was originally published by Loose Id years ago, but it's been revised, expanded, and has a new cover - and it is now published by Total ebound Books in England!


Title: Mistress MineBook one in the Kinky Kruising Series
Author: Lyn Cash
Publisher: Total-e-bound Publishing
ISBN: 978-1-906590-09-3
Release Date: 24th April 2008
Genre: Contemporary erotic romance/light bondage/BDSM
Book Length: Novel


RC Jones poses a problem for his sibling, who wants RC out of the way before their grandfather’s upcoming birthday. Shanghaied, inebriated, and tossed onto a cruise ship for the kinky, only to wake up with a leather-clad dominatrix standing over him—just what every alpha male needs!
April is a psychology major who earns extra money during the summer by working as a dominatrix on a cruise ship.


When RC gets shanghaied, April thinks he’s her next submissive. But a challenge is issued—if she falls for him during his ‘vacation’, she becomes his submissive for two weeks.

What’s a woman to do?

Read an excerpt here.




Spies, Lies & Duct Tape
by Lyn Cash
ISBN #9781419914331
Cover art by SYNECA




from one reviewer: If you liked the TV show, Alias, or the movie, The Long Kiss Goodnight (both of which I love) then you’ll appreciate Spies, Lies & Duct Tape. I just hope there is a sequel planned. ~ Ecata Romance



Spies, Lies, and Duct Tape is a delightful book. The characters are charming and big than life. Fans of romantic will not want to miss this one! ~ Review Your Book.com










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7 Comments:

At 6:05 PM, Blogger Nina Pierce said...

Oh, Lyn, I love your guys! I was hoping to sneak over and see a picture of all of you in the hot tub! And I never said I didn't believe you ... but the pictures have now made me green with envy! ;)
Nina

 
At 6:28 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

hehehe - I'm so glad we're on this cyber tour together, Nina - it's been fun getting to know you a bit better.

 
At 1:06 PM, Blogger Sam said...

Great guys, yes!!
And the cyber tour is excellent!
Great idea!!

 
At 5:52 PM, Blogger Denise Patrick said...

Waaaaaahhhh! The pics are taking FOREVER to load and I've got to run. I'll just have to check them out later.

In the meantime - there's more great news on my blog (below the TT).

 
At 8:34 AM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

*waves to Sam* THANK YOU

Denise, sorry about the pics! ACK. I'll have to use fewer of them next time.

 
At 8:38 AM, OpenID relliott4 said...

Love the pics. They sound absolutely wonderful.

Your name came up at the conference. Judith mentioned you. Oh and so did Sala recently. :)

 
At 8:30 AM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

waaah - I miss my Oklahoma writer friends. Tell Sharon Sala and Mz Judith I said HELLO next time you see them. :) Tell yourself and CJ that as well. *sigh*

 

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Friday, May 02, 2008

What I've been reading lately...

Thanks to Hosty Rae at eHarlequin.com, I've been doing book reviews, not just reading. I posted two reviews today at their site. One was on a book written by Merline Lovelace. You gotta check out her website and that photo of her (the blonde in the boa) – I’m jealous because she has champagne and chocolate in the photo as well. The other review was on a Silhouette Desire written by Maureen Child that I enjoyed.

Other than the books mentioned, I've also been reading blogs (Heather Rae Scott's, of course, considering she's been on my mind and has hooked me back into the Harlequin site). And...I'm really enjoying a work of nonfiction by Joseph J. Ellis called Founding Brothers. Maybe it's because of a recent trip or to to DC, maybe it's because of the HBO series on John Adams. Whatever it is, I'm big into history again and am THOROUGHLY enjoying Founding Brothers.

Here is a review that's better and more thorough than anything I'd have done on the book - read it if you're really interested in the American Revolution and the events surrounding it. I truly cannot say enough about how well this book works for me!

On the writing front, I just turned in edits for Sins & Redemption, which debuts in June with Ellora’s Cave. Lex and I recently sold Pandemonium to Total ebound Books in England. Who’s Your Daddy is going to print! (Any famous authors wanna read it and give us a blurb? – lol)



I miss my step-dogs in DC today. Aren't they adorable???

A seriously WTF moment for me…

My favorite link of late. (As in it brings me to tears - the man is simply beautiful.)
And now, I’m gone. *poof*
Have a great rest of the week, everybody.
~ Sunny Lyn

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Thursday, May 01, 2008

I'm just at a loss...


...for words. A writer without the right words isn't a pretty sight, but there ya have it. I haven't blogged in forever and then only sporadically. Doctors' appointments then and now, nothing major. Another friend's death, very major to me, but nothing anyone could do. Aorta blockage, quick (within hours). To cut her open would have killed her instantly, and to leave as is meant a 24-hour bleed-out. At least she got to say goodbye to her kids that way.


Speaking of Kids...we've been house-hunting. Last one looked so good we almost bid on it. It practically screamed "little old man wearing plaid golf pants lived here", but it was a cute house with an intercom system, full basement, landscaped yard, and lots of kewl extras. It was also just off of a busy street and had several stairs, and that was a double no-no.

It's spring in the midwest, so we've had alternately sunny then rainy days. Today and tomorrow are supposed to be rainy ones, I believe. I've lost count. Think Sunday is the only clear one for the next week.

I'm behind on a self-imposed deadline for my first f/f book. *blink* Your read that one correctly - LOL. Hey, I said I'd do it...I'll do it. I'm just a tad behind schedule.

The garden is growing like mad...INDOORS, mind you. Nothing in the ground until it stops raining - lol.

Have a good week, folks. Forgive me for not maintaining a better blog for a while.

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5 Comments:

At 10:18 AM, Blogger Lyvvie said...

*HUGS* take your time.

 
At 7:56 AM, Blogger Mechele Armstrong said...

Take your time. Good luck with the garden. So sorry to hear of your friend. :( (Hugs)

 
At 1:20 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

Thanks - both of you. I'm doing okay, just haven't felt much like writing or blogging, and I'm sure depression is PART of it. Springtime is another - lol. Just lots to do...and...to think about. Appreciate you.

Feel sappy when I say WHY I'm off-kilter and don't want to bring anyone else down. At the same time, I do know I have a lurker or two who may wonder WTF is going on.

Again, simply...Thanks.

~ Sunny

 
At 3:35 PM, Blogger Kiera said...

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bobbie, is this really you? If it is I'm going to freak out royally. I read Lies, Spies, and Duct Tape, totally unaware. I can't stop saying OMG OMG OMG.

Like riddles? CHS 1970

 
At 3:23 PM, Anonymous coweta said...

SOMEBODY e-mail this girl and tell her to check her blog she is MIA

 

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