Fact Or Fiction?Cece reminded me of a favorite character on CSI being on tv last night, and I blew it and didn't get to watch, but something in her email triggered a blog post. I started to call this one "Buying Our Own Bullshit" but thought better of it. I've requested permission to use a great cartoon next, but I'm still waiting on a response (just sent it). You can view their selection at http://www.cartoonstock.com/directory/d/dominatrix.asp - it's #1, "The Bitch's Grill".
How do you feel about writers who claim that their writing is autobiographical in many ways? I have no problem with an author having a vast knowledge of any topic. In fact, it lends credibility to much of their writing, say if a medical drama is written by a former (or current) medical professional or if an attorney pens a legal thriller, that sort of thing. So why do I have such difficulty suspending my disbelief when a writer I've met claims she's a Dominatrix and that this is a lifestyle?
I don't always--trust me. But there are times when I look at someone and just wanna call bullshit. If they live with umpteen kids and grandkids under the same roof, if they never wear anything other than jeans or sweats in family photos, and their boobs or guts hang down to their knees, I just have a really difficult time in believing that they don leather thongs and hip boots, crack whips, and put nipple clamps on one another on a daily basis. Especially if they've had photos of their homes (as in apartments) out for view. I've lived in an apartment--we didn't have room for an extra closet, much less a dungeon.
And the image they're wanting me to buy gets distorted when I imagine one of the kids interupting at the optimum moment, which kids are apt to do. What do the Domme & submissive do?
"Hold that position, honey, sounds like Susie is throwing up--I'll be right back."
"But I can't breathe--at least take off my mask."
"Here's a straw--stick it in your left nostril while I get her a wash cloth and let the cat outside."
And can you imagine laundry day?
"Mo-o-o-m! Daddy's dog collar wound up in my sock drawer, and the spikes snagged my cashmere leg warmers."
Maybe what really bugs me is that it bugs me at all. I mean it's none of my business if they paint one another blue and one of them is in gravity boots when they do the deed. Many actors have facades while others are comfortable saying "It's a movie, people...get over it...I'm not really like this. It's a character I'm portraying." Maybe that's what I wish writers would do...get honest about themselves and their writing. If they write fiction, who gives a damn? I could care less if a housewife from Jersey pens porn or if someone living in an 8' X 8' RV in Tuscon writes about Hollywood moguls or Washington dignitaries as long as they can pull it off. My concern is with their writing, not their personal lifestyle. If their fiction isn't strong enough to be convincing, I just don't see the point in their professing that they know what they're doing because what they write is what they do. That's no different to me than if they prefaced all their work with a disclaimer in front of every book: Please, read me, because I really know what I'm talking about. Yeah? If so, why the need to explain?
Or am I being naive here? To me, it's rather nice to see actress Melinda Clarke as herself - I can buy it that she's not Lady Heather of CSI, that her nickname is Mindy, and that she has a life outside her work. Her work is more credible to me because she doesn't pretend she's a dominatrix 24/7 just so I can feel like I'm in a crime scene drama for one hour.
If you'd like to read up on a real dominatrix, take a peek at a website for Mistress Scarlet. Just don't confuse her with me simply because I've written a BDSM book. I'm sure she has better things to do than grouch about pretenders and debate the politics of honesty. *wink*