How about that? Two posts within a week.
I just spent the most wonderful day with another writer friend. Rain, my first Krispy Kreme donut experience, author to author chit chat, hugging a warm puppy (well he was warm after he nestled against my boobs for a bit). Thanks, Carol.It's always nice to talk with someone who has been in the trenches and survived the war. Have had one acquaintance tell another this week that (for whatever reason) she wouldn't sell what she was writing. Not "you might not", but you won't. And it took me several hours to calm down after that. I would hate to be the cause of another writer floundering with doubt demons simply because I was a friggin' know-it-all. First reaction with me is usually to smack somebody, even if verbally, and worry about the aftermath later. But it got me to thinking.
Over the past ten years I've done some major housecleaning and reorganizing of my personal life. If it (or even they) weren't working for me, if it/they were toxic, then...bye bye. Hurt like hell a lot of times, but wounds heal better when they're not perpetually reinfected with the same affliction. Self-centeredness or self-preservation? Maybe both. And if the world works the way I think it does, there are probably those who got rid of me for the same damned reason! As it should be.
So...my advice was to let it go. (Okay, my first advice was f*** her, but I softened. A little. I'm channeling David Carradine's Kung Fu character.) Path of least resistence, that sort of thing. How can you climb higher if you're willingly swimming with sharks? And there are a lot of sharks in this business, so either learn how to swim better, strap on the equivalent of a bulletproof wetsuit, or get out of the water. And sometimes getting out of the water simply means rising above it, not giving up.
So that is my Thursday advice. Don't give up. Do what you have to do within reason, don't hurt others (shame on the "you'll never sell this" folks), hone your skills, and have a few safety nets in the form of good friends, mentors, self-confidence, and passion.
posted by Bobbie (Sunny) Cole @ 3:58 PM
6 comments
6 Comments:
Excellent advice – both for the business of writing and of life.
This line hit home: “Hurt like hell a lot of times, but wounds heal better when they're not perpetually reinfected with the same affliction.” Have been getting rid of some toxic elements in my life – better late than never…
I have to second the line Beth pointed out. I've had to do this with toxic relationships. It's so hard.
I'm glad when you post. I don't always comment, but I read you in my Google Reader always.
And I um, remember my son snuggling into those boobs of yours once. LOL!
It's hard not to give up sometimes. This wait is killer. :)
I loved sitting in the rain with you yesterday. Although, dammit, I always smoke too much when I just sit and do nothing but talk. LOL My damn lungs are feeling it this morning.
Thanks, all. Beth, I'm with you in spirit. That sucks, but it does work!
Cracking up at thought of your son looking at me as if I were lunch, Rinda. Seems like yesterday.
And speaking of yesterday, I, too, had a marvelous time, Carol. I always feel energized after a visit with you, even if the lungs hurt - lol.
Hey everyone is responsible for their dreams and following them. And you should never, never let anyone stomp on them. The truth is you never know what will sell, no matter how much you think you know about the market.
We have to write the stories that call to us. Besides, less than a month after an editor told me that I shouldn't have written a gothic romance--they were dead, dead, dead, I sold said romance to my dream publisher.
YES - thanks for posting, Katy! You sure did! :)
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