Lyn's Licks & Laughs...with alter egos Bobbie Cole & Sunny

Some Weekend Silliness

It's been raining and the wolf-hound has the farts. I swear, the dog could peel paint from the walls.

Things have just been moving kinda fast - new home, new books coming out, no time to devote to any one thing in particular. So I'm taking the weekend to do more laundry (I want everything hanging up or folded and put away by Monday so that everyone can find everything they thought they'd lost or thrown away during the move). We've had sporadic meals, a hodge-podge of whatever was available to fix. So I think what happened with the wolf is that someone slipped him part of a beef enchilada the other night, and...well...Mother Nature took over.

Wisdom from Don the Handyman for you weekend party-goers:

THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon T

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Thanks, but I don't want to have sex.
2. Nope, no more beer for me.
3. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
4. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
5. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing

Another joke from Janet:

MAD WIFE DISEASE

A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine.

"What was that for?" he asked.

"That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Laura Lou written on it," she replied.

"Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Laura Lou was the name of one of the horses I bet on," he explained.

"Oh honey, I'm sorry,"she said. "I should have known there was a good explanation.

Three days later he was watching a ballgame on TV when she walked up and hit him in the head again, this time with the iron skillet, which knocked him out cold. When he came to he asked, "What was that for?"

She replied, "Your horse called."

And even though I 'should' save this one for autumn, ya get it now - but before you get too bent out of shape, I like my football and my Oklahoma teams. These were just funny IMO:

BIG TWELVE FOOTBALL JOKES

(1) What does the average Texas player get on his SATs? ...........Drool.

(2) What do you get when you put 32 Texas Tech cheerleaders in one room? ..........A full set of teeth.

(3) How do you get a Iowa State cheerleader into your dorm room? ...........Grease her hips and push.

(4) How do you get a University of Oklahoma graduate off your porch? ......Pay him for the pizza.

(5) How do you know if a Nebraska football player has a girlfriend? ..........There is tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup

(6) Why is the Colorado football team like a possum? ...........Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

(7) What are the longest three years of a University of Kansas football player's life? .........His freshman year.

(8) How many Missouri freshmen does it take to change a light bulb? ..........None. That's a sophomore course.

(9) Where was O. J. headed in the white Bronco? .Manhattan, Kansas. He knew that the police would never look at KSU for a Heisman Trophy winner.

AND FINALLY (drum roll and cymbal crash.....)

(10) Why did Oklahoma State choose orange as their team color?

...........You can wear it to the game on Saturday, hunting on Sunday, and picking up trash along the highways the rest of the week.

And to end this blog of silliness...this one rather touched me - it's a senior biker & his babe. But...what? No bitch bar???

posted by Bobbie (Sunny) Cole @ 2:29 PM 1 comments