Thursday, June 15, 2006

HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2029

No, I'm not angry. Just annoyed today.


Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia , former ly known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the AmericanTerritory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq,Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.

Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.

Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.

Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals, violates their civil rights.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.

Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.


Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

8 Comments:

At 9:19 PM, Blogger Rinda Elliott said...

I'm going to try and post. It hasn't let me post here for days.

What's up, babe? Long time no talk. I did promo your book yesterday and today, but Blogger wouldn't let me post the cover so I'll do it again in a week or so. (g)

 
At 9:20 PM, Blogger Rinda Elliott said...

Yay! It let me in!!!

 
At 12:13 PM, Blogger Shesawriter said...

Love the baby T-shirt! LOL!

 
At 2:20 PM, Blogger Rae said...

I'm so sorry you're annoyed. Wish there was something I could do.

I'm howling at the baby T-shirt as well.

xx

 
At 3:11 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

Rinda, both my Kids have been sick - She might have a tonsillectomy in her near future, and He has another sinsus infection plus ear infection. I haven't blogged in ages, have been a bit ragged keeping everything/everyone going - lol. Slowing down soon, though. At least I'm still walking.

TANYA!!! I've missed seeing you - mean to come visit your place soon.

Rae! *waving*

That baby looks like a Baby Vin Diesel to me.

 
At 3:14 PM, Blogger Rinda Elliott said...

Oh man, give Josh and his girlfriend a hug from me. I'm sorry. Summer illnesses bite.

 
At 7:32 AM, Blogger Amie Stuart said...

Hug the kids for me too!!! We've all got that sinus allergy crap and it's hotter than hell to boot =(

But you made me laugh!!!!!! LOL

 
At 7:08 AM, Blogger Michele said...

ROTFL!!!
There are so many I liked and laughed at, am unable to single one out - maybe Grandma? LOL

Fun post!

 

Post a Comment

<< Home

Total-e-bound eBooks