Sunday, October 08, 2006

Games Authors Play

Friend Alex was told by editor that her last heroine was TSTL (too stupid to live), so now she's having to go back and make the ditz more dazzling. I feel for her...both heroine & author, because I've known 'those people' who were so book smart they're scary but their social skills and polish are so rough they make Timothy Hutton appealing. (Anyone seen him in Queen Latifah's funfest, "Last Holiday"? - omg - F-U-N-N-Y - he plays the asshole employer).

The Kid rented a movie I have yet to see: Second Best, a Joe Pantoliano film (I love Joey Pants). The Kid is on a flight to Virginia (business), and I'm already missing him. *sigh* One of the things I promised I'd do while he's away is watch that movie, and a second promise was to WRITE. Somehow I've gotten off track. I have one manuscript I'm supposed to be re-keying (got lost when a hard drive went kaput - and the damn thing has been requested by a big NY house), two novellas for EC, and one for Samhain that were all promised...with deadlines...and somehow, the girl who was always ahead of the game the past two years is...well, about to fall behind. It's not too late, so WHY in the name of all that's holy can't I find my stride again? Moving...okay, moving twice in a six-month period...might have something to do with it. Friends fear it's burnout. I'm either too ditzy or blasé to be concerned or am just deluding myself.

I tell myself it's because I can't smoke inside, and I always write with a ciggie burning in the ashtray. Okay, yes, I know...nasty habit...awful for health...and I'm cutting back...just not out yet. But back to my whining...I tell myself I can't write without the nicotine nastying up the desk. I tried 'cheating' by opening the window, but there's no screen. Instead of writing, I wound up shooing out flies and mosquitoes and trying to hide the evidence from the rest of the house by burning candles and incense. Dropped the damn ashtray out the window once and nearly caught the rose bush on fire. Squished a Tootsie Roll bank trying to hold up the freaking window. And the candles and incense made my clothes stink.

I'll be moving my computer into the garage unless I can plant meat to seat long enough to create soon. Right now, I may be enjoying cool autumn mornings with my Starbucks on the patio, but come spring when no money is coming in, I'll be crying about not producing anything.

The ass-ripping by friends may now commence. Any advice on addictions and writing, giving up one without giving up the other? Saying the hell with it and just moving out to the garage until the snows start? (and it does snow here, I'm told...quite a bit)

Be kind......



At 7:40 PM, Blogger Ann Wesley Hardin said...

Suns, it might be a little bit o'burnout and a little bit o'life. God knows I've been there/am there myself.

I've kinda been waiting, with an evil pleasure, to see this happen to you, if only to confirm your humaness. Frankly, I'm glad you're human, cuz I had my doubts. And then we couldn't have been friends anymore 'cuz I'm prejudiced that way *gg*.

My two pennies? Take the time you need. If you're contracted, then you might have to pull a Nora and just BICHOK. But if you're not contracted (and that means no pen to paper--verbals don't count) take the time and recharge.

We all need it. I did. I took it and I'm back and IMHO what I'm writing is better than ever.

Enjoy the fall. Drink your lattes. Remember what life really is all about and then go write about it.

That's what I'm hitting you with.


Get going!

At 8:43 PM, Blogger Michele said...

I have no advice. I'm a sputter/stutter with my writing. I was going well, then I got a new part time job after 6 1/2 yrs as a stay at home mom. I love it, but it is so challenging with so much to learn, I'm brain fried by the end of the day...and I've only been working for three weeks.

So, all the best to you and your muse ...
write when you can, if only a page here and there, never let it totally get away ... too easy to do.
Does blogging count? *grin*

At 10:24 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

Michele, if blogging DOESN'T count, I'm in worse trouble than I'd originally thought - lol.

Ann, Lord love ya - you just opened up some daylight for me. Just hit me that I've lost some friends this year - some older than I am, one in particular quite a bit younger who 'shouldn't' have died, and I think I am doing exactly what you suggested without realizing it until now...taking the time while I've got it. You are so right - little bit of burnout and a little bit of life...maybe a whole lot of life.

Autumn is such a great season for forcing us to see color (at least in my corner of the world) - and it's the harvest. Maybe I'm harvesting emotions or something. Pulling together the abundance of life, culling what doesn't work, and storing up for bleaker times. Who knows? But you nailed it. THANK YOU. Sincerely. (Although you did make me laugh - lol - doubting I'm vulnerable.)

Jesus, the opportunity of a lifetime, and I'm doing nothing. I think that's what's getting to me. I mean I obviously don't feel bad enough, or that friggin' book would be in the mail. just opened my eyes. Maybe the books can wait sometimes, but those precious minutes spent with The Kids, The Dogs, FRIENDS, learning from the elderly neighbor, or just stretching my physical boundaries can't be lost.

I hate writers who do nothing on their blogs but hawk themselves, but I feel a huge draft every time I drop my damn pants on my blog and really let my hair down - lol. Thanks for the feedback, for making it easier to 'be human'. *wink* Love you both...


At 10:28 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

p.s. - I just sold a Wild Winter Quickie (male/male, no less, as "Cash Cole") to Ellora's Cave - ROFLMAO!!!!!!! Is it okay to brag NOW, while I'm just posting a comment instead of making a big production of it? *teeheehee* I truly forgot to mention it until right now.

At 10:00 AM, Anonymous Elisabeth Stewart said...

Lyn - I've been checking out your blog for months - whenever I need a good laugh or just a chuckle. I can also relate to some of your writing woes.

Confession. I also smoke. I spend way too much time making conditions "right" to minimize the smell/smoke before I actually begin to write. Why do I associate writing with having a cigarette going? Sick. I offer no solution to this problem - just thought I'd let you know you're not alone.

And congratulations of your latest sale. That will probably inspire you to get back at it...


At 1:07 PM, Blogger Ann Wesley Hardin said...

Very glad I could help in some way, Suns. Since last spring when I really hit a wall I've been feeling the same way--the opp of a lifetime and I'm pissing it all away. I ended up chucking everything and spending the whole summer with the girls, guilt free by my own orders.

It's the best thing I could've done. I got the chance to live again, to finish with the grieving, and act like a kid. You're still grieving, hon.

You also have to remember that even though we've only been published two years or so, we were working hard at getting there for many years. We all deserve a break, and taking a break ain't the same as pissing something away. Not the same at all.

Anyway, I know you already know all this *gg* But you know I can't keep my fat trap shut.

Love you too!

At 3:15 PM, Anonymous Heather Rae Scott said...

I'm a smoker too, as you know and I too have been smoking in the house during the day in areas that are designated as nonsmoking and lighting candles and spraying Febreeze.

My best friend here, quit. She's been doing so darned good, but she just moved into a house that wasn't ever smoked in. I worry about the smells and all that other jazz and my biggest thing is, will not having that cig smoldering stifle my creativity?

And I agree with Ann--it's life.

Congrats on selling an M/M and hey...

Key in the damn book, already!


At 3:32 PM, Blogger Trace said...

I'm trying to find my stride again as well. I'm filled with self-doubt though, because it's been so long since I've really written anything. But at least I'm doing at least one scene a day lately. Better than nuttin'.

About smoking. I used to smoke and I'd have a cigarette burning beside me all the time too. I missed it when I quit, but I got one of those stress ball thingies for when I wanted something to do with my hands, and I'd have coffee or some other beverage near me for the hand to mouth thing. It helps.

At 3:38 PM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

Elisabeth, thanks for the support - and right back atcha. *sigh* My non-smoker friends (and family especially) are like "so just stop" - lol. I have no clue why I associate smoking with writing unless it's that many of my writer friends smoke, and that's where we hang out at conferences...sharing a drink, a smoke, and a chat.

Heather, happy for your friend - think she has one up on us for being in a house that's never had smoke. Maybe I'm just reaching, but... *wry grin*

You've all been very kind - almost makes me teary-eyed. Expected an ass-whoopin' and got a hug - lol. Ack. I hate procrastinating, and this doesn't feel like procrastination - feels more like 'don't give a shit yet but know I will later', if that makes any sense.

I have a few more hours left before I crash tonight, so maybe I'll manage to get a few pages in before that happens. Hugs to all of you - and I'm pastdue in visiting the rest of you, so thanks for popping in. Miss you when you're not here.

You also have to remember that even though we've only been published two years or so, we were working hard at getting there for many years. We all deserve a break, and taking a break ain't the same as pissing something away. Not the same at all. Okay, that does make sense. What? Like about 15 books between us in 2 years?! *faints*

Editor Angie wanted to know what's coming with my mainstream books, and Lord help me I have one that may get my arse in trouble - Real Women Authors - sort of a 'Same Time Next Year' scenario (Alan Alda, Ellen Burstyn - spelling?) only with writers. Already into it, just worried about getting sued - lol.

Okay, enough. Thanks again - will take time to catch up on reading and blogging later this evening. Storms coming tomorrow, so want to do this ASAP. hugs...

At 6:18 PM, Blogger Michele said...

Oooh, M/M book? Bet it's hot! *wink*
congrats on the sale.

Now, why would you ever think you'd get a whuppin'? Of COURSE you'd get a *hug*

You got more than one hug, and you deserve many more. All authors need to replenish the well, and real life with a loving family fits the bill just fine.
Don't feel guilty, wasted effort. You should be feelin' ALIVE!!!

At 9:33 PM, Blogger Charlene Teglia said...

If the problem is your window, go to the hardware store and get one of those one-size-fits-all adjustable screens and you'll be bug-free while smoke goes outside.

Ever read Julia Cameron? Her books on writing are full of tricks to get work done. Writing in 5 minute blocks. Switching around to work in different places throughout the day.

Hope you're enjoying your time when you're not writing. That's important.

At 8:22 AM, Blogger Lyn Cash said...

Trace, I have stress squeezie things around here somewhere - Mom works for health dept, so they're in shape of carrots, fruit, etc, but that's a great idea that I haven't tried. Ditto the screen, Charlene.

Okay, no writing yesterday other than blogging - drizzling rain this morning (we weren't supposed to get rain until late afternoon), so I'm gonna do at least SOMETHING on the writing while I'm here at computer. Thanks, again, Michele, everyone...

At 2:28 PM, Blogger Amie Stuart said...

I"m so there =( and I have a contracted deadline but life is just ...not pretty right now.

Anyway there's this stuff called STOP IT Smoking by Natra Bio and it's a homeopathic chewable and it really does help with the physical side affects when you quit. It worked for me last time I quit. =(


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