Fruit Salad
When did all of our bath & beauty products start resembling a fruit salad? All I want is a good, hot shower, but the shampoos and conditioners are everything from melon to limon, strawberry to boysenberry, kiwi to grape, with an occasional lilac or orange spice thrown in. I'm surprised nobody has come up with vinaigrette yet. And don't get me started on feminine hygiene products, although I can totally understand anyone wanting to get a fresher smell down there. But garden scents? Are those truly the odiferous memories we carry with us from childhood into adulthood? Why not something from the kitchen?
Maybe my upbringing was a tad different from everyone else's, but Dutch apple pie, cinnamon buns, vanilla added to cookies and cakes, even a damned green bean casserole or beef rump roast would be a change of pace. Hmm. Maybe the fruity scents are to keep the dogs from humping our legs or something. I mean, that roast beef would definitely cause Trouble in my house.
Who knows where ad execs get their ideas. I just wish they'd revert back to the 80's now and then, when female scents were labled My Sin, Shalimar, White Linen. Gimme a female scent, not some food processor re-hash of my refrigerator's fruit & veggie bin. Hell, if it's for the underarms, call it
No-Sweat. If it's vaginal cream or spray, call it
Puss-In-Boots or
Puss-In-Heels. Something that deals with what it IS and what I'm wearing, not what I eat. Lesbian feminine spray?
Muff Muncher. Athletic chic?
Fast & Loose. Busy mom? Call it
Fuck-You-I'm-Busy. Anything but a fruit that only lasts about as long as the damned scent does.
I need to write. Definitely a Lyn or a Cash book, not a Bobbie, not with the mouth I've got today.
Happy Smelling, ya'll...
~ Sunny Lyn
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Seriously
I need a sign plastered on me that says Old Teachers Never Die, They Just Lose Their Class.
I'm in a weird writing space, doing a bit of editing on one hand, writing on the other, and having to say NO to folks bugs me. I mean, I get enough rejection as a writer--I don't need the headache of dumping that off onto someone else.
I'm also having gender issues. My male/male persona has books to write, but the chick lit writer wants her say and keeps crowding him to the back of the room. Never mind that it's no longer chick lit but women's fiction. The pink sheep of the family isn't taking the news well at all, so the feud escalates. I just want the people in my head to shut the hell up for a few hours. Let me enjoy the snow. Formulate a better writing agenda. Maybe a shower would help.
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I'd rather be...
Productive? I just don't have much steam to do anything for some reason. Maybe I'd rather be cooking than writing...or traveling rather than sitting on my butt. Dunno. I filled out one of those 'get to know your friends in 2010' memes, and I wonder why the heck anyone would want to know that much about me. Boring...me, not the meme.
I looka at the snow we've had (not as much as some folks have had, that's for sure) and imagine spring bulbs popping up from the ground like rainbow sprites or something. I look at the WIPs I open and imagine them to be completed masterpieces.
Ain't happening. I am delighted that I've accomplished what I have thus far in 2010, but I see that long stretch ahead of me and wonder how I'll possibly get everything done that I want to do before December 31st.
I'm looking forward to so much...i fear I'm missing some of those "now" moments, and I really treasure those. The family is fine, I'm fine, the weather is pretty, if sucky for most. And I don't want to let go of the comfort of the now, but I have an itch to sample some of the what-ifs of tomorrow.
Color me in limbo. Hope the rest of you are more grounded today. If not, find me in cyberspace and we'll have a cup of whatever and some good conversation. Maybe you can kick me in the pants and get me interested in those WIPs that I've abandoned.
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3 Comments:
I know this was about scents, and I wholeheartedly agree, people should not smell like fruit, except for citrus. I like a bit of lemon, bergamot and lime. Lime...yummmy. Bite worthy scents.
Anyways, It for some reason made me think about this skit called Bo Derek Style. Then just keep watching, Smack the Pony was a great show.
I absolutely agree! Who wants to smell like fruit? I don't get it.
I have had this thought myself, many times, but you wrote it so eloquently!
Ok, you crack me up. And I'm sorry to say - I happen to love the fruit stuff because it's the only stuff that I can wear that doesn't make me SICKER THAN A DOG!!! Anything with flowers or musk and you might be rushing me to the hospital.
Still, they don't have to go as overboard as they have. There are some scents out there - hell, I didn't even know that fruit existed!
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